(copied from another forum I visit)
>>
>>Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Mayo
>>(IRELAND).
>>
>>He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an
>>email he sent to his sister. She then sent it to RnaG (Irish radio
>>station) in Galway, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.
>>Needless to say, she won.
>>
>>Hi,
>>
>>Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a
>>bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work,
>>so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's
>>not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first
>>must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
>>
>>As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
>>the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool.
>>So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial
>>water heater. This 20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the
>>sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to
>>the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose Now this
>>sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no
>>complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is
>>take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my
>>whole suit with warm water.
>>It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
>>
>>Everything was going well until all of sudden, my arse started to itch.
>>So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
>>seconds my arse started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but
>>the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot
>>water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now,
>>since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick
to
>>it. However, the crack of my arse was not as fortunate. When I scratched
>>what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into
>>the crack of my arse. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over
>>the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he,
>>along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
>>
>>Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
>>agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes
>>before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
>>When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass
>>helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
>>running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it
>>on my arse as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out,
>>but I couldn't crap for two days because my ****** was swollen shut.
>>So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
>>worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your backside.
>>
>>Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."