peter026

Grot :D

Mad

Ask

Hi Ermes, and welcome to the club :D

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Do you iron your underwear as well :winky:

Almost as dirty as my Surf , but then Surfs are made to get dirty in :winky:

Welcome to the club :D You've just missed a good one. Graham put his on Ebay

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My PC runs 64bit, but XP was preloaded, so I haven't a clue what version it is

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Crazy

Just two days off over Christmas and that's it :winky:

Welcome to the club, and hope you find one soon :D

Done and Dusted :winky:

Yuk Now that is OTT

Ogre

Sonus and Klasse get everything Here

The following questions and answers were collected from last year's exam results (GCSE's). These are genuine responses!! (From 16year olds)! Classics Geography Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutant like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight. Sociology Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on? A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. s*x can only happen when a male gets an election. Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. Biology Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death. Q: What is artificial insemination? A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. [He got an A] Q: How are the main parts of the body categorised? (E.g. abdomen) A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O and U. Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Cesarean Section." A: The Cesarean section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas. English Q: Use the word "judicious" in a sentence to show you understand its meaning. A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face. Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight. Technology Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head

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Hope everyone got what they wanted...........We are off to the local Pub for dinner now :D No cooking or washing up in this house today Just remembered Son and Partner coming round this evening for nibbles, so Alison will be cooking and I will be washing up after all :o Merry Christmas LOC