eXOBeX

Never knew my car had an "ECU helicopter loading site"! :P Still, glad I don't drive an IS, which appears to have a "Suicide Seat"!!!

I use the Canon LIDE-50, again a decent scanner. Fast, too (USB2)

Y-reg (82) Toyota Corolla estate D-reg (86) Toyota Corolla hatchback H-reg (90) Toyota Carina II (sold to my sister, got back, going to my brother when he passes his test) P-reg (96) Toyota Carina E (swapped with my sister's Carina II last Chrimbo) N-reg (95) Lexus GS300 52-reg (02) Lexus GS300 SE Also worth a mention is the nitrous-equipped M-reg (94) Rover 220 Turbo I straight-swapped for the N-reg GS. It's on eBay this week!

A mate of mine was spotted doing about a ton along the M4, night-time. Cop in the layby flashed the blues, my mate s**t himself and slowed down, cop knocked off his blues and stayed put. Lesson learned.

He's in West Yorkshire, that points to either Leeds or Bradford.

91 eventually. That was a hell of a target, ad77!

Good-oh. I'll be down anyway, surprise visit to my sister who keeps nagging me to go! She'll be expecting lunch at the Pulpit, not me!

Fight Club

Click here for the North Wales story. Click here for the Norfolk one.

Thought I'd dig this one up from the archives. There was a black one in the Gumball 3000 this year, and YES, it's bl**dy ugly! £250,000 for that or £233,000 to go to your Lexus dealership and pick up an IS300 SportCross, GS430, RX400h SE-L, LS430 with PCS & ACC plus an SC430. In other words, collect the set. If I had that sort of money to burn, I know where I'd be going.

This is still going ahead, isn't it?

"Sniper" Tonefinder, that's me! Sorry Nige. Just got off the phone to Toyota in Builth, ordered a spray-can of 8P8 to colour code 'em!

And cops like Scarface can't do a thing about it. Why? Because a clip round the ear will cost him his job. His hands are tied. Same goes for teachers. When I was in school (late eighties) the threat of the cane kept most of us in line. I avoided getting caned (just). What do kids have to avoid these days? Tell a teacher to f**k off and there's nothing he can do about it. When I was in school you'd instantly get a belt off the teacher, be hauled off to the head's office, probably get caned, your parents told and you'd probably get a belt off them, too. Here's my proposal: the LOC Rent-A-Thug Service. Teachers having trouble with an out-of-control, bullying little git? Ring the LOCRATS helpline. We'll send a local LOC member to the school. You just point out the offending pupil, LOC member walks up, punches him full in the face and walks back out of the school. "Must've been one of the parents" is all you need to say. Pay via PayPal. Discounts available for taking out gangs of five or more.

I put a Rover 220 up on eBay earlier with an MP3 of it running, too!

Does anybody have a set of fitting instructions for the Lexus Parking Aid LPA400? I need to know the recommended mounting positions for the parking sensors. Bought a kit off eBay, it's brand new and comes with the user manual but no installation instructions. Should be able to suss out the wiring of it, though (power from the reversing lights - duh!)

So we can quote you "happy", then?

There's an Autocar road test here from 29th March. Not the same review, is it?

I prefer the Virtual Bartender A few commands to try:- sing | maid | benny | fight | psycho | gun | jedi | pretend | guitar | strip | banana | cherry | frank | blackjack | poker | chicken | barbie | breast compare | breast show | breast scale | breast rub | strip trisha | strip lisa | breast trisha | breast lisa | beer trisha | beer lisa | nipple | fire | light | butt | wild | pitcher | salute | magic | kiss | kiss me | jump | bend | can | dance

Camilla

Nag

He didn't get my memory card, copy protection dongle or a chimney pot! My tape measure was on the list of possibles, though.

It can appear in the group of three, but not as a "year of registration" letter. My first car was OUH **Y

That would be my reg, mk2 GS also - same colour. No idea where M4 J33/37 is though.... ← You'd have been heading towards Cardiff from Swansea. Car was same colour as mine.

Okay, eight versus six... The one on our left is an 8-LED wide-angle bulb (four forward, plus up, down, left, right). The one on our right is a 6-LED bulb (all point forward). Hard to tell in this pic, but the 8-LED bulb does seem to spread light around the lens a bit better. I'll buy a pair of 8's, they'll either go in the rear courtesy lights or (more likely) the sidelights, seeing as today is the first time I realised they share a lens with the main beam, not the dipped headlights that I always have on "auto"!

Oh dear, talk about s****ing on your own doorstep... Just spotted the van parked in a side street about half a mile away, outside the druggie flats! Spreading rumours that where you used to live, one of the local thieves set off out to break into your house but "never came back" , that would probably make them think twice, too...