This week marks our first anniversary, and I have to say that I love my 300h more
each day.
Looking back, quarrels have been rare except for when, without explanation, she
would sometimes refuse to connect to my iPhone, or suddenly cut me off in mid-
conversation. From time to time she would also freeze my iPod and memory sticks,
but this was because she needed time to digest the contents before delivering them
with fidelity and impressive power, sometimes accompanied by album art and other
times not. Now that I have learned to be patient with her and push the right buttons,
she is reliable and fairly predictable, although her frequent mis-hearing of vocal
commands indicates a congenital defect which, if left untreated, she might pass
on to future generations. Her navigational skills are occasionally questionable but,
when she promptly supplies alternative choices, easy to forgive.
When asked to move, she does so with poise and feline grace, stealthily and
silently, gathering pace fluidly and without apparent effort, her body so smooth and
firm as to make the weekly application of foams and cosmetic potions an addictive
delight. Indeed, like all thoroughbred beauties, she insists on cleanliness and dreads
the slightest blemish, inside and out. When in motion, she does not drone but almost
imperceptibly purrs, and her whine upon stopping, which some have unkindly but
not altogether unjustly likened to that of a milk-float, is neither offensive nor annoying
and, on acquaintance, becomes quite pleasing. In an overcrowded and noisy world
pervaded by noxious fumes, she enfolds you in her protective embrace and calms
your fevered brow.
Her multiple charms do not come cheap, but you soon understand that her taste
for champagne can be satisfied for the cost of beer, since, like the well-bred lady
she is, she demurely sips and never gulps. Not unexpectedly, her lithe elegance
and hint of oriental mystery inspire admiration and curiosity, and perhaps a little
envy, especially among those accustomed to weightier and brasher teutonic curves,
but her response is neither haughty nor ill-mannered. Rather, she reveals herself as
being pleased to be different.