Why Being A Bloke Is Great!

[djanderso]

Being a bloke is great because ...

Your **** is never a factor in a job interview.

Your orgasms are real. Always.

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You don't give a rat's **** if someone notices your new haircut.

Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

Wrinkles add character.

A few well placed one night stands gain credibility, not leave you

tarnished.

You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.

People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

Porn movies are designed with you in mind.

Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with "So, notice anything

different?"

You can throw a ball more than 5 feet.

One mood, ALL the damn time.

You can open all your own jars.

Dry cleaners and hairdressers don't rob you blind.

You can go to a public toilet without a support group.

You can leave a hotel bed unmade.

You can kill your own food.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be

your friend.

If you are 30 and single, nobody notices.

Everything on your face stays its original colour.

You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You don't have to clean your flat if the electricity meter reader is

coming.

You can sit in silence watching a football game with your mate for

hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me."

You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.

If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just

might become lifelong friends.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You don't have to shave below your neck.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December

24th, in 45 minutes.

Same job ... more pay.

The world is your urinal.

[tony_hetherington]

A-men!

[AMH]

Superb collection :D

[Bazza-old]

but we cant wear dresses

[Dr Evil]

but we cant wear dresses

What are you trying to tell us Bazza?

[djanderso]

We have a cross-dresser in the club! :D :ooh-ducky: :ooh-ducky:

[Bazza-old]

We have a cross-dresser in the club! :D :ooh-ducky: :ooh-ducky:

maybe should have put a disclaimer in there somewhere

[dawesy]

that list is so cool and makes me proud to be a man

[neil is200]

i could go into the negetives of being a man but i would be here all day.

[Monster-Mat]

theres negatives, ok ok i would love my own pair of ****

[TonyGoose]

theres negatives, ok ok i would love my own pair of ****

LOL @ Mat

I guess any bloke who had a pair would never go out ... Be too busy playing

[dazzab69]

but we cant wear dresses

Unless you're Scottish !

[Teddy]

that's a classic. I have always said, if I come back in another life, I will always want to be a bloke.

You forgot to add:

Blokes don't go through the monthly oil change. Even cars don't change oil every month?

You can get yer legover, roll over, snore, and without feeling the need for a cuddle.

You can watch "MEN & MOTORS" without feeling disgusted.

[tdiplc]

Quality job djanderso - Good work fella

[dlayen]

great list

:D :D :D

[UltraViolet]

Yeah yeah yeah ...... some of that we are jealous of ..... but there is good reason why it is better to be a woman.

It is much much simpler for us to;

a) get our own way

B) please our partner

c) get forgiveness for whatever ......

..... just get naked and bring beer! :D

[Bazza-old]

Yeah yeah yeah ...... some of that we are jealous of ..... but there is good reason why it is better to be a woman.

It is much much simpler for us to;

a) get our own way

B) please our partner

c) get forgiveness for whatever ......

..... just get naked and bring beer!  :D

and of course you can wear dresses :D :D

a word said in jest ,could be your downfall

[UltraViolet]

I suppose - but dresses are not my style.

More a leather and lace kind gal! :winky:

[Bazza-old]

I suppose - but dresses are not my style.

More a leather and lace kind gal! :winky: