New Girlfriends Christmas Present

[Monster-Mat]

A Young man called Ron wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new

girlfriend. They hadn't been seeing each other for very long and she lived

a considerable distance away. He consulted with his sister and decided

after careful consideration, that a pair of good quality gloves would

strike the right note, not too romantic and not too personal.

Off he went with his sister to Harrods ladies dept and they selected a

dainty pair of fur lined quality leather gloves. His sister bought a pair

of knickers for herself at the same time.

Harrods had a free gift wrap offer but the assistant mixed up the two

items, the sister got the gloves and Ron got the knickers. Good old Ron

sent off his gift wrapped present in a parcel with the following

letter:...........

__________________________________________________ _______________

Dear Sasha,

I chose these because I've noticed that you are not wearing any when we go

out in the evenings. If it had not been for my sister I would have chosen

the long ones with buttons, but she wears shorter ones (which are easier to

remove). These are a very delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from

showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and they

were hardly soiled at all..

I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart in them even

though they were a little bit tight on her. She also said that they rub

against her ring which helps keep it clean. In fact she hasn't needed to

wash it since she began wearing them..

I wish i was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt many

other hands will touch them before i have a chance to see you again. When

you take them off remember to blow into them a little bit because they will

be naturally a little damp from wearing.

Just imagine how many times my lips will kiss them during the coming year.

I hope you will wear them for me on our next date.

All my love

Ron..

P.S. My mum tells me that the latest style is to wear them folded down with

a little bit of fur showing.

[Wallace]

Matt please leave me off YOUR present list!!!!

[Steve ( West Mids )]

Nice one Mat :)

Thought you had bought her this:

Stud?

Stallion?

Playboy?

Mediocre?

Measure your performance with this naughty device. Accurate to one grain of sand.

[Unregistered_User]

Heard before but still makes me smile ;)

J

[peter026]

Nice one Mat

[Noel]

good one Mat

[WylieCoyote]

Umm, Steve, I'm interested in those egg timers. Before now I manage with a stopwatch. Where do you get them from?!!!

Hehe.

Keith

[Steve ( West Mids )]

Wylie I had to buy two of the timers as one didn't last long enough

[WylieCoyote]

Steve, of course another way I've used before now is timing with a pan of soft boiled eggs. 3 minutes, perfect eggs every time!!!!!!!!!