Do Not Sell My Personal Information Jump to content


  • Join The Club

    Join the Lexus Owners Club and be part of the Community. It's FREE!

     

Recommended Posts

Posted

Late last Saturday night; a young chap was walking home from the pub. It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing.

Most of the streetlights in the area were broken, and the silence was only broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a dustbin. Then suddenly he heard a strange noise....

BUMP........

BUMP........

Startled by this, he turned, and to his amazement, through the driving rain, he saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road.

BUMP........

BUMP........

BUMP........

He froze to the spot, he couldn't believe his eyes, as the box approached from the shadows, he was able to make out its shape more clearly.... it was a coffin. Not wanting anything to do with this, he put his head down and started walking briskly home.

BUMP........

BUMP........

BUMP........

He could feel the coffin gaining on him, he started walking .........

BUMP........BUMP........

BUMP........BUMP........

BUMP........BUMP........

The coffin was closing with his every step, he started to jog, but he heard the coffin speed up after him......

BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...

BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...

BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...

He started to sprint, but so did the coffin .....

BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....

BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....

BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....

Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was only seconds behind. Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled out his keys, His hand trembling, he managed to open the lock, he dived inside slamming the front door behind him. He shot into his front room, and slumped into his comfy chair. Suddenly there was a loud crash, as the coffin smashed its way through the front door. The force of the impact broke the lock off the coffin, allowing the lid to swing freely on its rusty hinges, as it continued its chase.....

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking legs could take him he bolted upstairs to the bathroom and locked the door........

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP....

BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...BUMP...SCREECH...HOP...

The coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing and launched itself at the bathroom door. With an almighty smash, the bathroom door flew off its hinges..... The coffin stood in the doorway, then started to approach the young terrified lad.

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for his bathroom cabinet...... he grabbed a bar of Imperial Leather soap and threw it at the coffin.......

still it came ......

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

He grabbed his can of Lynx deodorant and threw it .......

still it came......

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

He grabbed his first aid kit and threw it .....

still it came......

BUMP...SCREECH...BUMP...SCREECH...

He grabbed some Benelyn cough mixture and threw it........

The coffin stopped.

:ph34r::whistling:

Posted

Oh that is terrible! I can't stand jokes that go on for ages and then have an awful punchline.

Still made me wet myself though! :lol:


Latest Deals

Lexus Official Store for genuine Lexus parts & accessories

Disclaimer: As the club is an eBay Partner, The club may be compensated if you make a purchase via eBay links

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now






Lexus Owners Club Powered by Invision Community


eBay Disclosure: As the club is an eBay Partner, the club may earn commision if you make a purchase via the clubs eBay links.

DISCLAIMER: Lexusownersclub.co.uk is an independent Lexus forum for owners of Lexus vehicles. The club is not part of Lexus UK nor affiliated with or endorsed by Lexus UK in any way. The material contained in the forums is submitted by the general public and is NOT endorsed by Lexus Owners Club, ACI LTD, Lexus UK or Toyota Motor Corporation. The official Lexus website can be found at http://www.lexus.co.uk
×
  • Create New...